I’m only a couple chapters in but so far it’s pretty interesting. Some of his interpretations of sayings of Jesus are new to me. It seems like he tried very hard to have a quote from Jesus to fit each of his points. While I appreciate the thought, I think it makes it seem like he’s stretching things a little with his interpretations. But the overall thrust of the book has been good so far. I’ll post more about it when I finish if it continues to be good.

I had a bit of an epiphany between my visit to Horizon and my drive home while thinking about the trip. I realized that I wasted most of the time I was a part of Horizon. I focused way to much on the system and trying to influence it instead of just loving people and investing in their lives. People at Horizon see me and say, “hi Dan” and maybe ask how things are. But I didn’t invest enough personally in people to really have anyone excited that I was there. I’m sorry Horizonites… I didn’t love you very well. I can compare and contrast that to my previous time leading Young Life. Even now when I run into former YLers they are very excited to see me. I had invested in them. I loved them well. Gotta make sure I learn from this stuff.

Alicia seems to have really enjoyed it. More than I did anyways. I thought it was a well made movie, but one thing bothered me throughout the whole movie. It bothered me that they portrayed love as something that has to be sexual. Love is not wanting or needing to possess the another person, that is lust. I want to be the kind of person who can love someone, pursue their best, even be affectionate to them, without it being sexual or without one person trying to possess the other. This movie is closer to most people’s realities than my ideals. Hollywood has incredible power, I just wish that would use it to inspire us to rise above our own mess more often.

Of course most of the publicity about the movie focuses on the idea of two masculine men being lovers. I’m not homophobic(I got over that in college), so there wasn’t shock value to it for me. It was sad that they wanted to be together and society made it unacceptable. But it was equally as sad to me that neither of them really learned to love anyone well(although you saw the first hint of it with his daughter at the end).

I really feel like I was never equipped with any framework to understand real pain and suffering. When those I love suffer, I suffer with them. It effects me. In infects me. The best I can do is let out a scream, “this is not the way it is supposed to be!!!!” I don’t want to hear that it’s part of God’s plan, I completely reject that idea. This may be something that some people need to think to be able to go on with life, but it is not an acceptable answer to me. It leaves the situation unchanged and gives a blessing to what I can only see as the work of something evil. Something or someone is trying to destroy people, and often succeeding. Whatever or whoever this is, I want to oppose it. That is my adversary.